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November 23, 2010

A phone call to O2.

Man: “Hello, O2 speaking.” (or words to that effect…)

Me: “Hi, I was just wondering why my phonebill’s £10 more than it normally is?”

Man: “Ok, no problem. Let me have a look at your account.”

Me: “Thanks.”

Man: “Ok, I’m looking at it now. Right, it seems you’ve got a £10 loyalty discount.”

Me: “How does that work?”

Man: “Well you’re a loyal customer, so we’ve given you a loyalty discount.”

Me: “Right, but how does that explain why the bill’s £10 more than normal?”

Man: “Because you’ve got a loyalty discount.”

Me: “But the bill’s more expensive, not less.”

Man: “Yeah, it’s a loyalty discount.”

Me: “Right, listen to me. My bill is £10 MORE than normal. It’s MORE expensive. It’s bigger. It’s larger. Not discounted. Not less. Not smaller.  Are you saying that because I’m a loyal customer, you’re charging me MORE? Are you saying that I’m being penalised for my loyalty? In your parallel world, is a ‘discount store’ a shop where everything’s far more expensive than normal? Surely if I’ve been loyal, you should be REDUCING my bill – making it LESS – not increasing it like some kind of anti-loyalty punishment?”

Man: “I take your point.”

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